Food For Gods
by Any-Clan
Summary: Anubis is ill and it's up to the Reader to take care of him! Will you succeed or will he only get worse? (I think you know the answer to that)


**So I recently got into Kamigami no Asobi, and I was reading around the limited fanfiction and realized something. There are no reader inserts for Anubis! There's some for Thoth (two, as far as I know) and at least one for all of the main boys (barring, I believe, Thor, Dionysus, and Akira, who technically aren't part of the main cast or whatever. It's odd.) (I've never played the game, though). So I decided to make one for my fav god! **

**I apologize in advance this is only my second or third reader insert. I'm also only on episode 4 of the anime. Anubis gets introduced in episode 5. *farts* *excuse me* And sorry for the weirdness of this AN, and the fic. It's 12:20 at night; while I'm at my most creative, I'm not at my most coherent. **

You were absentmindedly wandering the halls at school, not really in the mood to do anything, but too antsy to keep still. You would have gone to the library and wandered through the bookshelves there until you were taken by a book, but you weren't in the mood to read. You didn't want to really socialize, you _are _an introvert at heart, so you didn't exactly want to sit outside. And you really didn't desire to bake anything for the cooking club (baking club, really) of which you were the only member.

So here you were, wandering the halls. While you're walking, though, you hear a whimper. That means only one thing. Gamzee's in the vents! No, actually, though you did amuse yourself a bit with the Homestuck reference **(Gods condemn, I hate that webcomic!)**. What it means is that Anubis is somewhere nearby and chasing squirrels in his sleep!

You hear another whimper, this one followed by a small moan. _Aw, Anubis. What a sweetie._ You had gotten quite close to Anubis over the past few months since being brought to the school. After the initial shock and fear over the situations—I mean, c'mon! Gods! Real, honest to goodness Gods!—you had began to see him in corners and sunny spots. Every day was another game of 'Spot the Anubis'. Then one day you sat next to him in the library. At first he had bolted, but he eventually came back and sat near you. Every day after that you tried your best to spend a little time with him, eventually making him little treats. Dog safe treats, of course.

That's when Anubis began to seek you out, eventually having a spot next to the oven for when you were baking Thoth cornbread and corn muffins and him psudo-Milkbones.

"Ow…" You hear him moan. _Uh oh, that's not good. _

You quickly begin to search for him. He isn't near the windows or where it's sunny and you continue to search, eventually finding him in a cool, dark corner. _That's odd. Anubis is usually cold and in the sun. Why's he here? Does he miss the tombs back home?_

Taking a better look at him, you notice he's ashen and has a light sheen of sweat on his face. His arms are wrapped around his midsection like his stomach hurt and he's quietly whimpering. You gingerly move a wet strand of hair from his face.

"Anubis?" You murmur. He shifts in response. _Why is he like this? _

Then you remember. You had been looking to chat with the young god and found him curled up next to a cooling oven, where Yui and Apollo had recently taken out a cake. _That's right, didn't Kusanagi-chan and Apollo give him some double chocolate cake? What the Hel?! Why'd they do that, dogs can't eat chocolate! Now Anubis is sick! _(You, being you, didn't eat any)

"Hey, wake up," You whisper while gently nudging him.

"Ah…? Ka?" He groans.

"Anubis, will you sit up for me?"

"Ka bara."

"Please?"

He snorts, but sits up.

"Thank you." You feel his forehead. _He's clammy. _

"Does your tummy hurt?" He nods in response.

"C'mon hunny, let's go get you somewhere more comfy." You extend your hand out to him. He groans and shakes his head in protest.

"Anubis…"

"Ka bara bara!" You sigh. He was being oddly stubborn.

"Sweet heart, you're not going to get better sitting in this corner. Can't you at least sit in a chair?" _Where the heck are all these terms of endearment coming from? I know I have a crush on him, but geeze. _

"Ka," He whines.

"Fine. I'm going to get you some gingerale to help with your stomach," You say while putting your jacket on him like a blanket.

"Bara?"

"Yeah. Now don't move; I'll be right back."

You quickly walk down the halls towards the kitchen, trying to think of ways to get Anubis somewhere more comfortable like a bed or chair. _Maybe I should just tell Thoth. Nah, he had said something about grading essays. God of knowledge or not, those take time. Besides, I know a thing or two myself. Even if Anubis' zoolatric form made him sick in the first place, his anthropomorphic form should work well enough with what I give him._

"Nymph-chan!" _Oh, great. Apollo, just who I wanted to see. _

"Hey."

"Where are you going?"

"To the kitchens."

"Can I come with you? I haven't talked to you in a long time!" He smiled. _But we were talking yesterday! Wait…_

"Sure, I guess. But could you do me a favor?"

"Yeah, what is it?"

"Could you go get me a blanket and some pillows?"

He quirked a brow. "What for?"

"Anubis isn't feeling well, and I'm trying to make him more comfortable."

"But he was fine yesterday! Do you want me to get Master Thoth?" His face darkens, and he frowns in worry.

"No, it's just an upset stomach. Those are easy to take care of."

"You don't think it was the cake, do you? I remember reading somewhere that dogs can't eat chocolate."

"I'm thinking it was. But let's not focus on that. We'll get things done faster if we work together, and we can always go to Master Thoth if it gets really bad," you say.

"Okay! Let's do it!" Apollo says enthusiastically, racing off to get what you asked for.

"Meet me at the kitchens when you've got them!"

* * *

"Anubis? Anubis?" You coo in his ear, trying to rouse the sleeping deity. You and Apollo had agreed to try and take care of Anubis, you giving him what he needs and Apollo getting it for you, until about three, unless it got worse. Then Apollo would alert Thoth of the problem and have him deal accordingly. 'Essays take time to grade.' You had explained to him when he asked about simply having Thoth take care of it.

Said sleeping deity began to wake up. Bleary-eyed, he looked up at you. You smile gently, and put your hand to his forehead again. _He isn't any better._

"Here," You say, handing him a pillow as Apollo wraps him with the blanket.

"Ka…bara?"

"Apollo's here to run errands for me if I need something, so I don't have to leave you alone," You explain, pouring a little cup of Canada Dry for him. "Drink this."

He takes it gingerly and stares down at it. He looks back at you. You nod your head and he takes a sip.

"Ka?"

"I don't know why, but it helps with upset tummies. So I want you to drink all of that, if it doesn't come back up we can start giving you some ice to chew on and a bit of Jell-O **(I probably don't have that 100%, but whatever. Suspend your disbelief)**, okay?"

Anubis nods his head. Apollo asks if he should start the Jell-O, and you excuse him. After he leaves, you see Anubis cozy into his makeshift bed.

"Name?" He asks quietly before taking another sip of his drink.

"Hm?"

"Bara bara?"

"Sure, baby. Once upon a time, in a land far, far away there was a kingdom where everyone told jokes, all day long. One day, however, a strange person fell from the sky. Everyone was afraid, but Sir Funnybone, the Kings right hand man, said that this stranger had the royal birthmark and was the long lost prince! Everyone was so happy, and a great feast was prepared. But all was not well in the kingdom. Sir Funnybone was going to steal King Funshines' royal scepter and use it to get the royal jewels! He almost succeeded but was foiled by King Funshine and his friends, who had been told by Gig, Funshines closest friend in the kingdom, about the plot.

"'Why did you try to steal the royal jewels?' everyone asked. 'Because,' Sir Funnybone replied, 'My home is no fun, everyone is serious and they don't know how to laugh. I was hoping the magic from the jewels would help them see the funny side of life.' 'Don't worry Sir Funnybone!' King Funshine declared. 'My friends and I will help your people!' 'Yeah! How about they all come to the feast!'

"They did, and everyone lived happily ever after."

"I'm back!" Apollo called out, interrupting your storytime. He hands you a little bowl of lime Jell-O. You hand it to Anubis and he slowly eats it.

"Oh, no! I forgot that I had to meet Fairy-chan to talk about a sports festival! Don't worry, though. I'll still do that thing at three," Apollo said, winking at you before running off.

"Okay," You lamely call after him.

There was a pause.

"Name?"

"Yes?"

"Are you and Apollo, y'know?"

"NO!"

Anubis recoils and your shoulders sag guiltily.

"We just have something set up. Don't worry about it."

"Okay."

The two of you chat for a little while and Anubis dozes off occasionally, but quickly wakes up each time. _Poor baby, he looks so tired. _As if reacting to your thought, his eyes light up and he looks at you.

"Name?"

"Yeah?"

"Will you sing me a lullaby?"

"Of course," You say, smiling gently and tenderly tucking his hair behind his ears.

"Open up your door, my friend, and let me come in. Come in from the firefly darkness to hear your stories again…

"Who has seen the wind, neither I nor you. But when the leaves hang trembling, the wind is passing through…

"Silently, into the night I go, into the fragrant night I know not where. The path is strange my weary steps are slow, I do not find you there…"

While this is going on, Anubis managed to go from resting his head on your shoulder to sitting in your lap with his head on your chest, listening to your heartbeat while you hold him. What neither of you realized was that the clock had chimed three and Apollo was currently leading Thoth over to where you two are.

"…silently, silently, I come to you~." You quietly sing, popping the high G. "Oh!"

Apollo was smiling brightly, and Thoth just sighed. _Crap…_

"What am I going to do with you two?" He mutters, coming over and scooping Anubis up.

"Thank you for taking care of him for me while I was busy. I know he can be quite annoying when he's ill, so this is quite a testament to how much he likes you," Thoth says.

"Anytime, sir." You mock salute him and he rolls his eyes.

"Oh, and by the way…"

"Yes, sir?"

"…nice voice." You smile at the compliment and Apollo comes over quietly complementing your singing voice and asking if you and Anubis were now an item. You hold up a hand to hush him.

"Let's not worry about that right now. I'm curious as to what this sports festival is going to be. We don't have those where I'm from."

**Tada! End of story. Just to clarify a little, I hate how they call him Apollon in the anime, it irks me, so I'm calling him Apollo. As for the zoolatric and anthropomorphic forms, those are basically Anubis' animal/part animal forms and his human form. Almost all Egyptian gods have them except for a few, such as Ptah who is always human and I believe Ammit and Apis who are only animals. I might be wrong on those two, though. Ptah I know for sure. As for 'What the Hel', Hel is the Norse Goddess of Disease (and such) and the Underworld (also named Hel) and is Loki's daughter. See, it's a pun.**

**Anyways, all the songs 'you' sing can be found on Youtube. They are Come In From the Firefly Darkness, Who Has Seen the Wind, and Into the Night (depending on with version of Into the Night you choose, the singer might not take the high G. I just prefer to do that, but it's no biggie). **

**Sorry for any OOCness and coherency errors, but I hope you enjoyed it a little bit! (oh, and bonus points to whoever correctly guess the movie reference/summary that I used during storytime) **


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